The All-Pervasive One!
Sometimes I wonder at a normal happening in a household; the husband comes home from work, most probably switch on the TV while having his tea and relax. The children come home; eat, play and relax. The other family members have their space for work and relaxation and the so-called ‘home maker?’
Her ‘work at home’ starts early in the morning; she works when her husband is away at his work. She works when her husband comes home from his work. She works when her children are away at their studies. She works when her children come home from school or college. She works when the other family members are at home or away from home.
Her ‘work at home’ ends neither with the end of the day nor with the end of the work and play of the family members!
Sometimes, I wonder as how to call such a hard working woman?
The Multi-Tasking Manager?
The Home based CEO?
The Teacher at home?
The Financial Director of the Family?
The Nurse who takes care of her family member who has fallen ill?
The Advisor, Guru, Follower and a Good Friend?
The Customer Care Executive on a 24*7 Call?
The Housekeeper of the house?
The Goddess of Durga with ten hands?
Some people even call her as a “housewife”; making me to further wonder as to whether she is the wife of her husband or she is the wife of all the material and immaterial things at her house as well!
At times, even her own family members make her to feel that she is JUST a housewife and NOT a working woman! From when on a home maker does not work? What a thankless job it could ever be?
However, if you are a HOMEMAKER, you should sit straight and stand tall, because you are the person around whom your family orbits about, just like planets orbiting around the mighty Sun.
Certain important tips to make you to realize your great value despite being the common factor in your family:
Feel Proud of Being a Home Maker: Home doesn’t make itself; you make the home to run. If you are a home maker, first and foremost, you should respect yourself and you should feel proud of yourself. The whole universe of your family revolves around you. You are the sacrifice factor, the saviour, the Queen, the Servant, the Comfort factor and all these roles rolled into one for your family!
2. You are Courageous: Realize your worth.
Realize that you are the most courageous person the world had ever encountered and you have no idea about that! True, you haven’t scaled the mountains. You haven’t crossed the desert or walked through the jungle.
However, realize that you have shown the courage to trust some one you have known only for a few months to a few years and had gotten married to him; you had gone on willingly with him to make a home, leaving behind the people you had loved and lived with for decades.
It takes more courage to leave everything behind to venture into an unknown territory called the life with a companion! It takes more courage than driving the Formula1 car or taking the venom out of a cobra!
Realize that you are more courageous than most of the people and be proud of yourself!
3. Multi-tasking: Understand, that you don’t realize the amount of work you put in, to make the lives of your family the most comfortable; you cook, clean, wash, tidy the home, make the children ready for school or help the grown ups to get ready; you help your husband in all the ways possible, do shopping, surprise family with gifts, take care of the guests and more!
Feel good about your multi tasking capabilities and you are never less than any one in the world!
4. Self-Confidence: Realize your worth! You are worth more than what you think you are worth of! You have more self confidence than the rest of the world.
You take care of the day to day issues and problems most comfortably without rushing into your family for solace; you take care of the issues at your children’s school and at their college; you handle the price rise and the shortage in your budget magnanimously. You work out a solution for the problems of your husband, as and when there is a need be!
You stand by your friends for their moral support and you extend invitations to even those guests whom you may not like personally, but still take care of them genuinely.
You attend classes and courses, when necessary and possible; you come out with flying colours in the trainings as well. You learn a new recipe and make it effortlessly. You help with the home work of your children comfortably. You manage the people around your home nicely and you manage the people in the outside wonderfully well too.
Realize that you are some one to be reckoned with and walk with a straight back and with a smiling face!
Q. Recently, I had been introduced to a friend of my children by my children as their mom and when asked what I was doing, they said carelessly, “Oh! She is just a housewife!”
I felt so hurt and uncomfortable in front of all. How one’s own family doesn’t understand one’s value? How can I ever make them to understand how much I have done for them and would go on to do for them, despite being a ‘housewife’?
It feels sad that one’s own family doesn’t understand one’s value. In a way, the home maker is responsible for such thinking in her family. She goes on sacrificing her comforts, her health and her life without any limit; she becomes an unpaid servant to her family, willing to be ordered around by all.
She appoints herself as the sentry, the cook and the waiter, the washer and the iron woman, the maid servant, an assistant, the decorator, the dusting woman and much more.
When someone gives so much of oneself, it is natural that the others would take her for granted.
You should stop being taken for granted. You should make your family to share, at least to a certain extent, your household work. Your husband should be made to understand that reading newspapers or watching TV does not come under sharing the household work.
Your children should be made to understand that they should be able to do their own work instead of depending upon you for a glass of water or for bringing a pen, pencil or their notebooks to them. They should be asked to make up their beds and clean up their rooms.
The moment you start asserting yourself in front of your family, they shall start looking at you in a different light. Not just a housewife, but the Wife and their Mom, who should be respected and not to be ordered around by them; a person who plays a vital role in their lives and take care of their well-being without expecting anything in return.
You should start claiming your own space and should command your own personal time to take care of yourself; your health and well being!
The more you respect yourself and show command on the others, the more they will understand that you are not ‘just the housewife’; you are the power behind their success, health and well-being!
So, the readers, the next time, when someone introduces you to a “house wife”, don’t raise your eyebrows with a fleeting glance of disapproval and think, “Oh, just a housewife?” Instead, think that “Wow! She is The Home Maker!”
She makes house a Home!